Genre Reflection #2

Sanity is the goal. 

 

What can I say about this semester to sum it all up?  Let’s start with “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” and let me tell you, this semester has sure tried to kill me.  Between school, health, family and all the dark forces, I am amazed to still be in one piece.  As far as health goes, I think I have caught every possible germ out there at some time during this semester.  I have battled sinus infections, a root canal and projectile vomiting.  I have missed more days this semester than I ever have in the past, really, you can check.

            Family has been another issue.  I have said to myself, many times this year that my kids were born to kill me.  I am a female living with four boys (husband included as he often acts more like a child) and they test my sanity daily.  I have dealt with zombies, potty training (not potty training zombies but trying to potty train a 2-year-old who can’t stop fighting the zombies long enough to use the potty) and a hormonal 15-year-old.  In between those two, I have a 6-year-old who is more emotional than I am (and that is saying a lot).  It is his first year in kindergarten and I have been getting notes almost daily from his teacher regarding his lack of coping skills.  Really, I am in college and I am having trouble with my coping skills.  The final string this last holiday was my grandmother falling and having to spend three weeks in the hospital.  She is due home this week and I am rearranging the whole house to make sure we can accommodate her needs. 

            School has definitely had its ups and downs as well.  I began this semester with the best attitude and much excitement.  About one month into the semester my CT had a family situation that changed her semester, as well as mine.  The semester I had planned turned ugly on the day she told me to sit down and wait until she was ready to speak with me.  I will not dwell on that, as I now get to work with a wonderful teacher who demonstrates skills that I am not used to.  She is very soft spoken and humorous, as well as very knowledgeable about teaching tools and methods.  As life often revolves in circles, I am once again excited about the upcoming semester.  We just finished reading The Lord of the Flies in our Freshman class and I am reminded that, well, at least no one has died yet. 

            When I sit and ponder all that has happened this semester and the complete fear that overwhelms me when I consider all that is involved in the KPTP for next semester, I have to tell myself to stop and just breath.  The thought that I began with, the “what does not kill you makes you stronger” is not even the driving force in my thoughts anymore.  I have switched to a new mantra.  Please Lord, just let me still be sane when I get through.  I told my mother that when and if I graduate this May, please be sure to tuck my diploma into my straight jacket as they haul me off to the padded room so that I have a reminder of why it was all worth it.  I know that the people I work with at the bookstore think I have already crossed over into the insanity, but I still have a slight grip left.  So if you pass me in the halls and I am mumbling to myself and have a wild look in my eyes, just be kind.